There is a lot happening in my life these days. I feel like Rip Van Winkle awaking from a 100 year dream, stretching my lazy bones. I can feel my heart pulling into so many lovely things and I can’t remember a time when I felt more alive in my own skin.
But, some days I wish I was even further along in this journey. I feel restless like I’m a little late for my own party? I wonder if I’m being challenged by the right things and supported by the best things that life has in store?
I came across this beautiful passage by Charles Baudelaire translated by Louis Simpson and it describes my state of mind perfectly.
You have to be always drunk. That’s all there is to it—it’s the only way. So as not to feel the horrible burden of time that breaks your back and bends you to the earth, you have to be continually drunk.
But on what? Wine, poetry or virtue, as you wish. But be drunk.
And if sometimes, on the steps of a palace or the green grass of a ditch, in the mournful solitude of your room, you wake again, drunkenness already diminishing or gone, ask the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock, everything that is flying, everything that is groaning, everything that is rolling, everything that is singing, everything that is speaking. . . ask what time it is and wind, wave, star, bird, clock will answer you: “It is time to be drunk! So as not to be the martyred slaves of time, be drunk, be continually drunk! On wine, on poetry or on virtue as you wish.”
Some days, when I can’t find the proper words to describe the stirrings of my soul, I’m happy to be drunk from the wisdom of others. I’m grateful for the gentle reminder… I’m fine.